The Secret Garden

If someone were to say, "Hey Heather, what have you been up to this summer?" I would:

• think it was bizarre that they used my first name in a sentence. I always find it a bit awkward when names are used directly in conversation.  For example, two people are speaking casually, and one person says to another, "Thank you, Joe." I don't feel it is necessary to use proper names unless there are blind people involved.

• most importantly, answer the question by saying that I have been gardening. I am a creature of habit and thrive best with a schedule. Thus, at 10:00 AM every day I spend time weeding and watering flowers in the front yard. 

I realize this makes me sound incredibly dull. I'm going to take it one step further. When I'm not gardening, I've been reading classic novels. Think of how terrible my biography would be. "Roses and Reading: The Stodgy Life of Heather B." It would be sold in the Clearance bin for $0.78.

I feel the need to keep a log (or blog, if you will) of how I spent a summer worth of free time. In order to do that, I'm going to need to rewind for a moment.

My family moved into our house in April 2016. On move-in day, it was a special surprise to us that the previous owner installed our privacy fence approximately 4-5 feet away from our neighbor's fence resulting in a 5'X 1/3 acre gap between the properties. This issue has fallen under the "we will fix this someday" list, but it has not been high priority.

Fast forward to present day. One day this week, the older of our two standard poodles would not stop barking outside which is unusual for her. I discovered (by peeking through the fence slats like a psycho) that she had cornered a little, tiny kitten in the overgrown alley between the two fences. I tried numerous things to get my dog to come inside. Keep in mind that all of these attempts were made from the front yard, thus visible by passersby. Furthermore, all attempts were made with my head pressed directly to a wooden fence and my eyeball lined up with the gap between the boards. Bribes/threats utilized: a can of Spam, a water hose, wet dog food, an iPhone doorbell app, Vienna sausages. Envision it. After everything failed, I had no other option than to trudge into the dark, overgrown yard territory where, I assume, poisonous plants are growing and nasty varmints are actively breeding.

The inspiration

In case you're worried: I did not die. Now that I think of it, between this post and the frightening fungus issue in the last post, this blog may turn up being my own documentation for Cause of Death. Spooky. Anyway, I made it to the end of the alley, saved the cat, chastised my dog, threw myself a little celebration for being a superhero, and got out of there as quickly as possible.

Uncharted territory

Wait for it, I'm going to bring everything full circle--kind of like a finale. So, after I escaped the backyard wilderness alley, got back to the safety of my house, and continued reading..."The Secret Garden," it hit me. I will turn this frightening jungle into my own secret oasis. I ran back outside and snapped this photo at the entrance of the jungle. So that's the latest thing on my agenda. I don't think I can keep it a secret from my husband since I am going to need his manly help (and money), but I'm wondering how long I can keep my secret garden away from my kids. #goals

As I realize that my summer vacation may be coming to a close and that I may possibly be returning to the workforce, the development of my Secret Garden may take a while. I'm thinking pretty hard about getting a sign printed that says "Coming Spring 2018." Regardless of whether or not the sign is made, you should probably go ahead and buy a fancy hat and start picking out your favorite tea for upcoming afternoons with me.

And that's what I have to say about that.

--H